She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize