I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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