Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
