He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
