He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
