He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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