So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
