Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
