why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
