I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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