I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
