okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Thank you for not boning my boss.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You are a genius and a whore.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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