I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
porn star boner night. come get it.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
