I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
