Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Randomize
