Non-Jews are for practice
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
