i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
