But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
handjob tips. give me some.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
