my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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