This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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