Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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