She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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