Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
