Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
