Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
