I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
