I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
