I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize