is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
