i just had sex bonerless
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
