Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
