you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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