No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
