Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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