Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
