Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
