You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
