So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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