I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
