Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
