Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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