And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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