She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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