handjob tips. give me some.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
