Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
