Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize