Is it normal to miss your booty call?
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
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