I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
