Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Randomize
