He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
