oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize