I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
